There’s a social rule that says you should copy the way the other person likes to communicate. Well, it’s more of a social phenomenon, where humans like to be around others who behave similarly to themselves, such as when someone sitting across from you crosses their legs when you do. Maybe I’ve broken a social rule.
If I can’t figure out a way to learn to navigate politics at work then I’m going to get fired. I won’t get good projects and that’s the equivalent of being told to get out.
It’s like if a piano teacher can’t figure out how to communicate with parents or students, they won’t get students. It doesn’t matter how good you are at your craft if you are not good enough for people to put up with your annoyingness.
My coworker who has Asperger’s said, “When I’m talking too much, slap me. I can’t take hints. You have to tell me to stop or slap me.”
She cut me off multiple times during a team meeting and I considered reaching across the table to slap her arm. But she’s wearing a nice leather jacket and I didn’t want to scratch it. I settle for waiting for her to finish. But that is the wrong thing to do, I think. It’s my meeting and I have to respect my coworkers’ time by keeping meetings on track.
My new strategy will be to stop trying to learn social skills myself and instead find people who can show it to me, because we notice other people’s social incompetence but not our own.
I wanted to know what problems piano teachers with Asperger’s run into so I could help. I think I found the answer I was looking for. I see it all over my life.